What’s something you recently said YES to when you really wanted to say NO?
To say yes to everything is to set ourselves up for an impossible task. We simply cannot do everything! And that is OKAY!! We are not built to do it all.
Saying no spurs growth and change. It forces us to adjust and it allows us to say yes to other things. No inspires creativity. Think about a time someone said no to YOU when you expected they’d say yes. What did you do? I’ll bet you got creative and figured out a new plan, and I’d even venture to say it felt better because it forced you to adjust and grow.
So how do we become masters at saying NO? Practice. It’s the only way. Practice saying, “I can’t make it this time.” Practice saying, “I am not the right person for that.”
Here’s a great example. If a client asked if I could build their website, technically I could say yes. Should I say yes? NO FUCKING WAY!! Not only am I not a professional web developer (and it would take me ten times as long), and simply knowing that would make me resentful of the fact that I am the one doing the work… building websites does not align with my purpose. It’s that simple. I am not the right person for that. So why even consider saying yes and set everyone up for disappointment? Just because you can “technically” do something, doesn’t mean you should do it. #stayinyourlane
Unless it's "FUCK YES" it's NO.
As you adopt this new practice, remember these three powerful thoughts to fuel you.
You deserve to say NO - you are just as important as everyone else! It can be scary to say no when you’re so used to saying yes. You probably even know someone who is really good at saying no, and if you paid attention, I’m sure you’d see they don’t make excuses or argue their case. NO is a complete sentence and you don’t owe anyone an explanation for it. Also, you are not responsible for the reaction you receive!
NO increases your value! When you say no, you are honoring your worth and demonstrating that power to the world around you. It’s that simple! And here’s a beautiful truth to let sink in… many people will respect you even more for setting personal boundaries.
NO is a new beginning! We are conditioned to believe that NO is equivalent to rejection. I have found it is quite the opposite! Not everything or everyone is for you. Saying no allows you to see a new perspective than what you were prepared for, and it inspires the creativity needed to move forward. And I think you’ll find it truly liberating to know something better is possible because of it.
Although no is scary, yes is scarier. Stop saying yes when you want to say no! Stop creating dead-ends. Create new beginnings!
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